If Only I could Stay Single… (1 Corinthians 7.25-40)

Someone in our home group this week asked two very good questions, and I’d like to start with them. He talked about how it seems like everywhere, you land on one of two sides: either you think marriage is dramatically important, and should be a major goal in your life; or, you unconsciously reject the idea of marriage because you don’t want to have to fit in a specific mold. So here’s the first question he asked: Why is the framework of marriage so omnipresent in the Christian subconscious? Why do churches talk about marriage so much, to the pleasure of those who are married, and the frustration of those who aren’t?

Well, a simple answer to that question is that the Bible speaks a lot about marriage. It’s the first institution of order that God set up after creating the world, and it is the framework in which he intends for humanity to do what they must do to survive—that is, have babies and have societies. It’s also, as we’ve seen multiple times in the past, meant to be a living picture of the relationship between Christ and his church. The images of marriage and adultery are very frequently used to represent faithfulness to God and rebellion against God. So we talk about marriage a lot because the Bible talks about marriage a lot.

Here’s the second question, though, and it’s an important one: Is there a reason why we don’t speak that often about voluntary celibacy, of the advantages of remaining single for life? That’s a very good question. Part of the answer is, of course, statistics: most of you are likely to get married at some point in your lives (that’s changing a bit these days, though not for the right reasons). But I think a big part of the reason is that it makes people—it makes pastors—uncomfortable, because we can easily have the feeling that we’re laying a burden on single people.

I’ve never had that problem—I don’t mind encouraging single people to stay single—but I’ll admit I’ve fallen into the trap of not speaking enough about this, for the simple reason that I got married very young, I’ve been married to Loanne for over half my life, so I forget what it was like to be single. Pastors naturally choose illustrations that are personal to them, which means most of my illustrations end up being, unintentionally, about my wife and kids.

I need to apologize for that, because it doesn’t remotely reflect what I believe. The funny thing is that single people often look at this passage with a scowl, because they don’t want to stay single, while married people often look at this passage and say, “He’s totally right.”

So today we want to examine why. Why would remaining single for life be a good thing for a Christian?

Quick note: This message isn’t just for single people, so if you’re married or engaged, please don’t check out on me, because the reasons Paul gives for not getting married are actually the same truths that should change the way we live in either situation.

Last week, Joe ended his message with a simple question. He said a sentence, and he left one word blank, and asked what word we would put in that blank. The sentence was: “If only I could change ___________, then I’d be able to live the life I was meant to have.” What word would we put in that blank?

The point of that exercise was to show us what Paul has been telling us since the beginning of chapter 7: if we belong to Christ, then there is no word that could legitimately go in that blank. Paul said it three times in last week’s passage: In whatever condition each was called to live for Christ, there let him remain with God. Wherever he has put us is where we’re called to live for him, and he gives us everything we need to live for him where we are. It’s not always going to be easy, but God doesn’t call us to do what is easy; he calls us to do what is right. And what is right is to live in obedience to his commands, where we are, because as we saw last week, God’s call on our lives is not for us to a job or to a partner or to a city or to a vocation; his call is that we follow Christ.

That is the reason for everything Paul said at the beginning of chapter 7, in the middle of chapter 7, and here at the end of chapter 7. But in order to really be on board with what he’s saying, we need to understand that God’s goal for the lives of his people isn’t primarily their happiness in this life. We’re promised eternal joys in heaven, and we do get to experience a foretaste of that joy in our lives today. But God’s goal is not to make us happy right now. His goal is bigger. His goal is the glory of his name displayed in the gospel, and proclaimed in the lives of his people.

If that is God’s goal, it should be the goal of his people too. And if it is our goal, then it will also reorient our priorities.

I think that’s one of the reasons Paul does what he does here. In today’s text, he comes back to the subject of marriage and singleness, that we saw two weeks ago. I think he comes back to it here because, a) the Corinthians had asked him about it, and b) there are few situations in which we are tempted to maintain the right priorities, to follow our own desires and our own ideas, than the situation of our marital status: whether we spend our lives with a spouse, or without one. At least 80% of the pastoral meetings I have are focused on this subject of marriage and singleness.

So in this text, Paul is being a pastor. He even says so in v. 25:

25 Now concerning the betrothed, I have no command from the Lord, but I give my judgment as one who by the Lord’s mercy is trustworthy.

Paul isn’t giving commandments here; he’s giving pastoral counsel. Being married and being single are both morally neutral situations, provided we go about them the way God wants us to. But Paul has been in the ministry a long time, and he is a single man filled with the Spirit of God. He has a very well-informed opinion on this topic, and he’s saying that even if this subject is morally neutral, we should take what he says very seriously.

So Paul is going to make a case for staying single, for life. He’s going to give several very practical reasons for doing so, and he’s going to give a foundational statement that explains why he feels so strongly about this. But as we’ll see, his statement actually applies to all situations, not just singleness.

So we’ll start with Paul’s practical counsel first. He’s going to give four practical reasons why those who aren’t married or engaged should stay single.

Marriage Brings Worldly Troubles (v. 26-28).

26 I think that in view of the present distress it is good for a person to remain as he is.

Very quickly—there’s a bit of debate over what Paul is talking about when he mentions “this present distress.” Some suggest it refers to a famine that was hitting Corinth at the time, or some kind of sickness that was making the rounds. And those things may be partially true. However, the context of a famine or of an illness doesn’t really change much; it doesn’t add much weight to his argument. So in light of what we see in the following verses, I think Paul is speaking mainly of the very simple difficulties of living the Christian life in the “present form of this world”, as he says in v. 31—that is, this period of time between Christ’s first coming and his second coming. We’ll come back to this subject in a few minutes.

V. 26 again:

26 I think that in view of the present distress it is good for a person to remain as he is. 27 Are you bound to a wife? Do not seek to be free. Are you free from a wife? Do not seek a wife. 28 But if you do marry, you have not sinned, and if a betrothed woman marries, she has not sinned.

So essentially, Paul is saying here the exact same thing he’s been saying since the beginning of this chapter: live faithfully for God, wherever you happen to be. If you’re married, stay married, and obey God faithfully in the context of your marriage. If you’re single, don’t be in a hurry to get married; obey God faithfully in the context of your single life. In either case, in terms of our holiness, in terms of our relationship with God, one is just as good as the other. Married or single, we can serve God faithfully.

But there is a big “but” that Paul wants to make very clear. At the end of v. 28, he says this:

Yet those who marry will have worldly troubles, and I would spare you that.

Now of course, everyone will have worldly troubles—that is, troubles that are related to our day-to-day life in this world. Everyone needs a place to live. Everyone needs to eat. Everyone has to deal with the world around them. Everyone has to manage their relationships with their parents, their brothers and sisters, their neighbors, their colleagues.

But Paul says that when you get married, those troubles will increase.

When I met Loanne, I wasn’t looking to get married, but I did have a romanticized view of marriage. Here’s what I mean by that: I didn’t think that marriage would be easy, and I didn’t think that marriage would be perfect. But I did think that marriage would bring me something I was missing—the love of a wife for the rest of my life. This was true. I’d never had the love of a wife, and I got that. My mistake was in imagining that having a wife that loved me would enable me to better face the challenges of my life, that my wife’s love for me would give me something extra, that would make it easier to live the life God called me to live.

And nearly every single person who wants to get married makes that same mistake, even if you don’t think you do. You may look at your life today and say, “I have a huge amount of ‘worldly troubles’, and having a spouse would help me manage those things.” That’s completely true: I cannot overstate how much Loanne has helped me with a lot of the problems I brought into our marriage, and (I hope) vice versa.

Here’s the thing, though: for all the things we’re able to help each other with, we’ve both brought in ten more problems that we can’t help each other with, and that we now share. The number of practical, everyday problems you have to deal with greatly increases when you get married, and that’s before you add children to the mix!

Being married definitely brings you things you don’t have today. But those things don’t make life easier; they don’t give you what you need to living the life God has called you to live.

And this is a very important distinction to make. Paul has a very specific goal in mind. His main priority is not our happiness, it’s not procreation, and it’s not companionship. When God said in Genesis 2 that “it is not good for man to be alone,” he was speaking about man in general—he was speaking about humanity, which would be far less populous without men and women together. He wasn’t speaking about every individual man.

God’s goal for every individual man and woman is that we live faithfully and wholeheartedly for Christ. That is the goal; that is the priority. And if we belong to Christ, that becomes—or should become—our number-one priority as well.

So marriage is good, yes…but it may be counterproductive. It’s going to make this goal of living joyfully and wholeheartedly for Christ more difficult, rather than easier, because it’s going to bring in a whole host of worldly troubles. The reason for this is very practical and very simple, and it brings us to our second argument in favor of singleness:

Marriage Brings a Divided Mind (v. 32-35).

Even though our worldly troubles do not make it impossible to live for Christ (what we’ve been seeing for two weeks now), they do make it harder to stay entirely focused on Christ. People who hear Jesus say, “My yoke is easy and my burden is light” and who respond with a skeptical “Really?” are probably being pulled in several different directions. Most older Christians can tell you that there is more joy in Christ when he has all of our attention, when he really is the sun in the solar system of our lives.

That’s where Paul is going; that’s what he wants for us. He wants joyful, wholehearted service to Christ, not halfway, pulled-in-ten-different-directions service to Christ.

V. 32:

32 I want you to be free from anxieties. The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. 33 But the married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34 and his interests are divided. And the unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit. But the married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband. 35 I say this for your own benefit, not to lay any restraint upon you, but to promote good order and to secure your undivided devotion to the Lord.

Paul says one or two things here that I personally find really surprising.

Here’s the first thing, and it should be a wake-up call to a lot of single folks out there. In these verses Paul assumes that all men and women are “anxious”, or preoccupied, by something—and that’s always true, of everyone. But here’s his assumption about single folks, and it’s surprising: he’s assuming here that the single people to whom he’s speaking are preoccupied by the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord. V. 32: “The unmarried man is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to please the Lord.” V. 34: “The unmarried or betrothed woman is anxious about the things of the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit.”

It doesn’t take a genius to know that this isn’t always the case—which tells us something. It tells us that he’s speaking to an ideal; he’s not saying what all unmarried Christians are like, but what they should be like. If you’re unmarried, your main preoccupation in life should be how to please the Lord, how to be holy in body and spirit.

That’s the first thing.

The second thing is that he also makes an assumption about married men and women. He says (v. 33): “The married man is anxious about worldly things, how to please his wife, 34 and his interests are divided.” And v. 34: “The married woman is anxious about worldly things, how to please her husband.”

It seems obvious, but here’s what’s surprising: Paul never suggests that it’s wrong for the married man or woman to be preoccupied by their relationship. He never suggests this is a bad thing. It is, in fact, the way it’s meant to be—if the goal of marriage is to present to the world a living picture of the relationship between Christ and his church, then that relationship should be taken very seriously. It’s not a bad thing.

However—and this is what Paul is getting at—this serious and good relationship does bring significant challenges to focus. It brings a divided mind.

People might hear that as idolatry, and marriage can certainly become that—but that’s not what Paul’s saying. He’s talking about the very normal reality that when you get married, that person becomes more important for you than anyone else you have ever or will ever know. No one has more power over you than your spouse. No one has more influence over you than your spouse.

If any of you criticize me, it probably won’t be pleasant, but I can take it; my skin is pretty thick. There’s enough distance there for me to think rationally about what you’re saying. But if Loanne tosses that same criticism my way—especially if she puts just a hint of zing in her tone of voice—she can break me. You guys can complement me, or say you appreciate me, and it feels good. But if we come home and Loanne says she loved my sermon today—I’m soaring. When she expresses appreciation for me, I feel like Superman. No one else can do that.

So because she is more important to me than anyone else, a considerable portion of my time and energy is spent trying to make her happy, trying to love her well, trying to build her up. Again, that’s as it should be—but it’s still a fact. Because I have her, there will be times when I’ll have to say no to you; our relationship places limits on the service I can give you. Because I have her, if she’s going through a problem, she’s going to become my primary focus, instead of you.

That’s the case for every married couple…and then you start having kids, and your mind gets exponentially more crowded.

This is the sort of thing Paul is talking about. It’s hard enough in any life to maintain good order and an undivided devotion to the Lord, as he says in v. 35. And it gets even harder when there are two of you. It’s not a bad thing—on the contrary. But it is more difficult.

Here’s his third argument in favor of singleness:

We are free…but called to be wise (v. 36-38)

36 If anyone thinks that he is not behaving properly toward his betrothed, if his passions are strong, and it has to be, let him do as he wishes: let them marry—it is no sin. 37 But whoever is firmly established in his heart, being under no necessity but having his desire under control, and has determined this in his heart, to keep her as his betrothed, he will do well. 38 So then he who marries his betrothed does well, and he who refrains from marriage will do even better.
39 A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives. But if her husband dies, she is free to be married to whom she wishes, only in the Lord. 40 Yet in my judgment she is happier if she remains as she is. And I think that I too have the Spirit of God.

Just a quick note here: people debate over male/female power dynamics in these verses, because in v. 36-38 he speaks to the man, and in v. 39-40 he speaks to the woman. There’s a bit of truth to that, because the man was the one with the power to validate or invalidate an engagement of marriage; the woman did have less power.

But I’m not going to get into the weeds on that subject, because Paul isn’t encouraging those kinds of power dynamics in these verses, he’s simply speaking to the reality of their situation at that time in history. And ultimately it doesn’t matter—what Paul says here absolutely applies to both the man and the woman in any given relationship. So we’re going to use what he says to the man and the woman interchangeably.

In v. 36, Paul wants to be clear that he affirms the full liberty of each person to do what they wish in the matter of marriage and singleness. V. 36: let him do as he wishes: let them marry—it is no sin. This comes back to what Paul said earlier about not having a command from the Lord—being married or remain single is a morally neutral subject. In both cases, this isn’t a question of sin.

It’s more a question of wisdom and efficiency.

If a couple wants to get married, that’s great—it’s fine. They’re not sinning. But if a single person is able to keep his sexual appetites under control and not marry, then that’s a good thing for him to do, for all the reasons we saw earlier. Both marriage and singleness are good—but, Paul says, singleness affords you more opportunities to serve the kingdom of God. It helps you keep your mind undivided, entirely focused on the Lord, and gives you the time to dedicate to his kingdom.

The other domain of wisdom Paul addresses here is the simple heaviness of the commitment of marriage. A wife is bound to her husband as long as he lives (and vice versa). If he dies, then she can get married again, as long as it is to another Christian, “only in the Lord.” But it would be better, simpler, clearer, if she remained unmarried.

In other words, marriage is not a small thing. Marriage is for life. Once you’re in it, you’re in it until death, either yours or your spouse’s. The simple weight of that commitment should be enough to help us see that the church needs people who can remain unencumbered, and totally focused on serving the kingdom.

It’s possible to do so whether you’re married or not, and we need both; but Paul is speaking from experience when he affirms that it’s easier to do this when you’re single.

Living for What Lasts (v. 29-31)

I hope you can see the freedom that Paul has granted us here. If you’re single and you want to get married, that’s fine. If you’re married, that’s great too. There is no obligation for a Christian to be in one situation or the other. And there are great advantages to both: Paul is speaking here mainly of the advantages of remaining single, but he speaks elsewhere (notably in Ephesians 5, for example) of the advantages of marriage.

Sometimes that kind of freedom makes us uncomfortable, because we’re in a specific situation today, and we don’t know whether or not we should go in one direction or another.

That’s why I think it’s vital to remember what Paul says in v. 29-31, which is sort of a guiding line for everything he’s said during this whole chapter.

29 This is what I mean, brothers: the appointed time has grown very short. From now on, let those who have wives live as though they had none, 30 and those who mourn as though they were not mourning, and those who rejoice as though they were not rejoicing, and those who buy as though they had no goods, 31 and those who deal with the world as though they had no dealings with it. For the present form of this world is passing away.

If we need a north star to navigate the situations of our life, this is it. None of the situations in which we find ourselves will last longer than our lives. The only situation that will last is the eternal kingdom of God. And the present form of this world is passing away.

So how should we live, in whatever situation we find ourselves? We should live for what lasts.

If we marry, we’ll build our marriage on the knowledge that this marriage is temporary—only as long as we’re alive in this world—and that our marriage comes with a call.

If we remain single, we’ll do it with the knowledge that our singleness is temporary—a bridegroom is waiting for us, and we will live united to our perfect spouse, our perfect King, forever.

If we’re grieving, we’ll endure our grief with the knowledge that this grief temporary, and joy is ahead of us.

If we’re happy, we’ll rejoice with the knowledge that whatever joy we feel today is nothing compared to the joy waiting for us.

If we gain material wealth and resources, we’ll think hard about how we spend our money, armed with the knowledge that a greater treasure and a greater pleasure than we can even imagine is waiting for us in Christ.

When we deal with the world around us, we’ll do it with the knowledge that this world, in its present form, will not be here much longer.

In every situation, we’ll live with the knowledge that this situation is temporary, and that our real situation, our permanent and eternal situation, is far greater, far more substantial, far more promising.

This is not theological fluff; I’m not trying to just make you feel better with churchy words. The truth Paul lays out in v. 31—that the present form of this world is passing away—should influence every single priority of our lives.

Think of it this way… How often do we look for fulfillment in other things than God himself? If you’re looking for fulfillment in your marriage, or in a future marriage, you will be sorely disappointed. If you’re looking for fulfillment in your kids, you will be disappointed. If you’re looking for fulfillment in your freedom as a single person, you will be disappointed. If you’re looking for fulfillment in your job, you will be disappointed. If you’re looking for fulfillment in your friendships, you will be disappointed.

None of these things are bad, but if they are what you’re looking for to be fulfilled, you’ll always be disappointed, because you weren’t made to find fulfillment in these things. You were made to find fulfillment in him alone.

So whatever your situation is, serve God faithfully where you are. Because where you are is where he is, and he is the source of your eternal joy.

If Only… (1 Corinthians 7.17-24)

Our topic this morning is God’s call.

I’d like to start by talking about a family I met last year in Lyon.

Eight children. A radical decision: to sell everything and leave it all behind. Home, city, comforts.

They had packed the essentials into a van and set off without knowing where they were going.

They had found a flat, but only for a few weeks. No clear plan. Just this conviction: “God is calling us to take a radical step; he will show us what comes next.”

I admired their zeal. But as I listened to them, I sensed the conviction behind it: to truly live as God intends, one must change one’s circumstances. Change one’s setting. Change one’s life.

Leave one’s nets behind, like the disciples.

This idea is nothing new.

In the 3rd century, an Egyptian named Anthony did the same.

He heard Matthew 19:21 — “If you wish to be perfect, go, sell what you possess and give it to the poor, and you will have treasure in heaven. Then come and follow me” — and took it literally.

Leaving everything behind to live in the desert.

His example gave rise to monasticism: men and women withdrawing from society to live in monasteries.

Behind this lay a conviction: to be truly devoted to God, one must change one’s circumstances.

True spiritual life requires a break from one’s circumstances.

I wonder if any of us have ever thought of that.

Not necessarily becoming a monk…

But asking oneself: am I truly living for God if I do not leave everything behind?

Am I a second-rate Christian if I work in an office?  Am I spiritually mediocre if my life resembles that of my non-believing colleagues?

Am I responding less to God’s call if I’m a postman rather than a pastor? An economist rather than an evangelist?

I remember, as a young Christian, reading this verse from Matthew and feeling guilty. I hadn’t left everything behind. I was at secondary school!

Where was my obedience to God’s call?

If you weren’t to identify as a Christian this morning, you might be wondering: does becoming a Christian mean having to literally give up everything?

Hence our question: do we need to change our circumstances to live the life to which God calls us?

We are in 1 Corinthians 7.

In the church at Corinth in Greece, some married people were wondering whether they should separate in order to be more devoted to God.

Others thought they should cut off relations with non-believers.

The question was the same: do we need to change our circumstances to live the life to which God calls us?

***

The answer from this passage: no.

Let’s read it together

1 Corinthians 7:17-24:

Furthermore, let each person remain in the condition in which the Lord called him. This is my rule in all the churches. Was anyone circumcised when he was called? Let him not seek to hide it. Was anyone uncircumcised when he was called? Let him not be circumcised. Circumcision is nothing, and uncircumcision is nothing; what matters is keeping God’s commandments. Let each person remain in the condition in which they were when called. Were you a slave when you were called? Do not worry about it, but if you can gain your freedom, make the most of it. For the slave who has been called by the Lord is the Lord’s freedman; likewise, the free man who has been called is Christ’s slave. You were bought at a great price: do not become slaves to men. Brothers and sisters, let each of you remain before God in the condition in which you were called.

What defines us is not our situation.

It is God’s call.

A calling that can be lived out anywhere.

First point …

God has called us (17)

Almost every verse in this passage mentions God’s call.

Once in verse 17, twice in verse 18, once in verses 20 and 21, twice in verse 22, and once in verse 24.

What is God’s call?

I remember when I told my bosses at my old job that I was leaving to train as a Bible teacher. “good for you”

Translation: you’re completely mad’

But others said ‘Oh, have you received a calling?’

But God’s calling here isn’t a call to do a certain job or to a certain life situation.

It’s a call to follow Jesus.

It’s important to make that clear.

We might read verse 17 – that each person should live according to the calling with which the Lord has called them – as if God were calling us to a particular job or situation.

Some Christians speak like that.

God has called me to become a doctor, or a lawyer, or an opera singer.

I haven’t yet met anyone called to work behind a supermarket checkout.

I didn’t know the Holy Spirit was so bourgeois!

In fact, Paul means almost the opposite.

God is sovereign, and in that sense, it is he who has determined our respective situations.

But his call is one that he addresses to us whatever our circumstances may be.

Paul begins this letter by introducing the Corinthians as “those who have been led to holiness by Jesus Christ, called to be holy”

In chapter 1, verse 9, he says: “God is faithful, he who called you into fellowship with his Son, Jesus Christ our Lord.”

Just as God had called Abram to leave his country…

Just as he had called Israel to leave Egypt…

Just as Jesus had called his disciples to follow him

Just as he had called out to Lazarus, who had been lying in a tomb for four days: ‘Lazarus, come out!’

God has called us … to follow Jesus … to belong to Jesus … and to shine with the glory of Jesus

If you are a Christian, God has called you out of darkness into his marvellous light!

He spoke a word—the same one that called the stars into being—and we were set apart as his saints.

The saints are not the Christian elite: all Christians have been ‘sanctified’, set apart for God. Placed on his team to display his greatness and goodness!

It is glorious. Compared to the billions of years since the universe began and compared to the billions of light years that the universe spans… we are nothing!

Yet it is we who have believed in Jesus whom the King of the universe has called and set apart for his glory.

That is God’s call. Not a call to a profession or a position.

The call to be set apart for God.

I know that name-dropping is a bit dull.

I beg your indulgence. I was at school with three people who received a rather prestigious calling.

Rugby player Sam Warburton… called to captain the Welsh national team, with whom he won a Six Nations Grand Slam

Footballer Gareth Bale… called up to join Real Madrid, with whom he won the Champions League five times

Cyclist Geraint Thomas… called up to join Team Sky and who won the Tour de France in 2018

Three calls to be set apart to experience glorious things…

… and me?

I have been called by the King of the universe to be set apart as his holy temple on earth and to reign with him in the world to come.

You too, if you have put your trust in Jesus.

I don’t know if you remember the moment you answered that call.

It probably didn’t seem like much.

I was sitting on my bed at the age of 14. I asked God to forgive me and to help me obey him.

But at that moment, the King called us and set us apart for his glory.

If you wouldn’t describe yourself as a Christian, this is the call God is addressing to you today.

It’s not something to be taken lightly!

The family I met in Lyon certainly didn’t want to take it lightly!

Hats off to them!

If we were ever tempted to say to them: ‘calm down, you’re being a bit too radical…’

… God’s call is radical!

We cannot be too radical in the way we respond to it.

He deserves our all.

One might think that being a Christian is just a matter of upbringing or an interest in ‘religion’.

Some Corinthians thought that being a Christian simply meant following the spirituality that was flavour of the week.

As if Paul, Apollos and the other preachers were nothing more than the most fashionable influencers of the moment.

No, says Paul!

God has called us and set us apart for his glory. It radically changes the meaning of our lives.

It changes who we are.

This is not to be taken lightly.

But what about our life circumstances?

They may seem rather unglorious.

35 hours a week in an office just to make ends meet.

Cooking three meals a day for our family.

Where is the radicalism?

Wouldn’t we be more faithful if we gave up our jobs, our studies or even our marriages?

That is our second point.

God has called us…

… to live for him where we are.

God has called us to live for him right where we are

Paul says this three times:

Verse 17 – let each one live in the calling to which the Lord has called him.

Verse 20 – let each person remain in the condition in which they were when called.

Verse 24 – brothers and sisters, let each of you remain before God in the condition in which you were called.

One might read this and think: here are the ultra-conservative Christians!

Everyone must stay in their place, just like in the Middle Ages. To each their rank, their social position. Maintain the status quo.

That is not it at all.

Rather, God’s call is so radical that it renders our situation or social status fundamentally irrelevant!

Manager or labourer, banker or baker, married or single — that is no longer what defines us.

God’s call defines us

But since our circumstances no longer define us, since they are spiritually irrelevant, we can remain in them whilst living for God.

Any situation that isn’t inherently sinful — like being dealing drugs or burgling homes — becomes a place where we can glorify God.

Not that we’re not allowed to change certain situations.

But we don’t need to change them, and we can be at peace if for whatever reason we cannot change them.

Paul gives two examples to demonstrate this, one religious, the other social.

Firstly…

• Circumcision (18–19)

Verse 18

Was anyone circumcised when they were called? Let them not try to hide it. Was anyone uncircumcised when they were called? Let them not be circumcised. Circumcision is nothing, and uncircumcision is nothing either, but what matters is keeping God’s commandments.

The example may seem far removed from our reality.

In fact, it is perfectly chosen.

Circumcision was the mark given by God to distinguish his people, Israel, from others.

In the Jewish mind, the great dividing line was circumcision.

You got rid of a piece of flesh that symbolised impurity.

But when Christ came and called us, he purified us completely and once and for all.

He took all our shame and guilt and nailed it to the cross.

Circumcision therefore no longer means anything. Anyone who believes in Jesus joins his holy people.

To non-Jewish Christians who might say: we must be circumcised, it is the historical mark of God’s people, Paul says: no! There is no longer any need!

To Jewish Christians who might say: ‘We must be uncircumcised, since circumcision no longer counts,’ Paul also says: ‘No!’

Circumcision no longer means anything at all.

Now, Paul does not choose this example because he fears that we might be tempted to be circumcised. Nor did he fear that the Corinthians might be tempted to be circumcised.

Here is why he uses it: if even the distinction given by God has become irrelevant to God, how much more any other distinction.

The family we come from, whether we’re aristocracy or have a title, our past, whether we are married or single… these things… do not in any way… define our status in God’s eyes! :-)

They are neutral.

What is not neutral is obedience to his commandments.

God cares far less about what our current situation is than about how we live within it for him.

Let’s not attach undue importance to matters that no longer define us.

What we’re going to study, what job we’ll do, whether we get married or not – these are big decisions.

But God says: you are free to do as you please. Where you are not free is in obeying my commandments.

Given the context of sexual immorality in Corinth, Paul was no doubt thinking first and foremost of the commandment to flee from sexual immorality.

Whatever choices we make in our relationships – whether to marry or not – that commandment must weigh on our decisions.

First example: circumcision

Second example…

• Slavery (21–22)

Verse 21

“Were you a slave when you were called? Do not worry about it, but if you can gain your freedom, make the most of it. For the slave who has been called by the Lord is the Lord’s freedman; likewise, the free man who has been called is Christ’s slave.”

In first-century Corinth, about a third of the inhabitants were slaves.

Slavery in the Roman Empire was not as atrocious as during the transatlantic slave trade.

It was possible for a slave to attain a relatively comfortable position, but one remained the property of another.

Paul says that if the opportunity arises, one can become free.

He does not forbid a change in circumstances.

But what he really means is that if freedom is impossible: don’t worry about it.

That is no longer what defines you.

You may belong to someone under Roman law, but in what matters most—eternity—you are free!

The slave who has been called by the Lord is set free by the Lord

He has set you free from sin, guilt and condemnation, and in relation to eternity, your current situation is an insignificant interlude.

And do not regard free Christians as having no constraints: “the free man who has been called is a slave of Christ”

When Christ calls us, He calls us into His service.

Absolute freedom does not exist. We always serve someone. Every Christian serves Jesus.

It is as if Paul were offering us a new pair of glasses.

In the light of eternity, it is not our situation or status that defines us.

God’s call has given us a new identity.

In the new creation, no one will care whether we were slaves or free, economists or refuse collectors, or even married or single.

What will matter is whether we had a relationship with Christ.

That is liberating!

We can be so self-conscious about our status. So insecure.

That is why employers are rebranding professions:

Sales assistants become sales advisors

Shelf stackers become stock replenishment assistants … so that it sounds more rewarding.

In France, we’re classified according to the famous CSPs – socio-professional categories – with some people being CSP+ or even CSP++.

We also talk about the ‘social ladder’, as if happiness were inevitably to be found on the next rung up.

Paul isn’t against social mobility; he says quite clearly, if you can become free, make the most of it… but… don’t worry about it too much.

You have been called… by God!

On the day of their call, I doubt the three athletes I mentioned had any trouble washing up for their families or taking out the rubbish. Their worth lay elsewhere; it was glorious, and when you’re sure of that, there’s no question of identity if you have to do thankless tasks. You know who you are!

In a group of this size, there are no doubt people doing a job they never imagined they’d do, or that their family never imagined for them.

Perhaps you didn’t train for it, perhaps it’s less prestigious or more gruelling than you’d hoped.

You have the right to change if the situation is getting you down.

But to make it feel less of a burden, perhaps you need to understand that your social status and job title are insignificant in the grand scheme of things. That’s not what defines you!

The call of God does!

Someone who embodied this freedom is a friend of mine called Anna.

I was in her Bible study group.

She’d studied drama but hadn’t found a job in acting.

She worked in a clothes shop, and whereas I saw that as a failure, she couldn’t have cared less.

Her identity came from God’s calling, not from her circumstances.

If that is the case, we should adopt a new motto for our lives.

Liberté, radicalité, banalité! (23-24)

This is the final point.

Realising that we have been called and empowered to live for God in every situation, whether ordinary or difficult, is true freedom!

If every situation is a good opportunity to glorify God, we can be completely at ease with our circumstances.

Verse 23

You have been bought at a great price: do not become slaves to men. Brothers and sisters, let each of you remain before God in the condition in which you were when you were called.

When Paul says: do not become slaves to men, it may seem like a contradiction.

He has just said that a slave may remain a slave.

There are many ways of being a slave.

One can be a slave outwardly, by being the property of a master.

But also internally, as slaves to the opinion of others or to the world’s standards.

It is from this second form of slavery that Paul wants to set us free.

We have been bought at a great price.

If you are a Christian, the King of the universe has bought you at the price of his blood.

What price could be higher?

God shed his blood for our freedom and has called us to be stakeholders in the resurrection, his holy priests, the heirs of the world to come.

No one is more privileged than the Christian!

Do not become slaves to the world’s ways of thinking!

God wants our freedom!

Perhaps this comes as a surprise.

One might think that God wants to stifle us with constraints. Christians have sometimes given that impression.

God wants our freedom. If you are looking into the Christian faith, this is what God wants for you, and he has secured it for you if you are ready to receive it.

Do not become slaves to men.

Paul says: your status in this world does not define you.

Do not live as if it did. That leads to slavery.

It can happen subtly.

The Corinthians thought they had to end their marriages to devote themselves to God. The same mistake as imposing celibacy on priests in the Roman Catholic Church.

Paul says no. You can devote yourselves to God whilst remaining married.

For all their zeal, the mistake made by the family in Lyon was similar.

Thinking that their situation was too ordinary to live out God’s calling.

The reality is that we can live a life of radical devotion amidst ordinary circumstances.

By nurturing our relationship with God, by obeying his commandments, by serving his people, by bearing witness to him around us.

Let us not be mistaken: sometimes, faith in Christ does indeed lead to drastic changes in our circumstances.

At Connexion, we have been organising mission trips to other countries for several years now.

I pray that some of you will leave Paris to serve Jesus where the Gospel is little known.

I pray that some of you will… go!

But not because you cannot live for God here.

You can be just as devoted to the Lord working by a supermarket checkout or in a call centre in the Paris suburbs as you can on a mission in the Amazon.

At Connexion, we train trainees.

This programme isn’t aimed at achieving a higher level of holiness, as if Eva, Dahlia and Silvain were some sort of monks or nuns.

No, this programme simply aims to train Bible teachers.

Perhaps some here would like to train for Christian ministry but, for one reason or another, now is not the time.

Brother or sister, that is a good desire, but even where you are now, you can live according to God’s calling.

One more word for those who want to change jobs.

There may be good reasons to change: more time with family, serving the brothers and sisters in the church, having more money to give.

But if that isn’t possible, remember who you are in God’s eyes, and live according to God’s calling right where you are.

If you’re looking for a job and can’t find the work you’d hoped to do, God wants you too to feel free and unburdened.

Taking a job just to make ends meet, at least until you find something else, is not a failure.

God doesn’t care about our job title… as long as we live for him whilst doing it.

That is true freedom!

I would like to address parents.

We have the right to encourage our children to pursue a good education, as long as we show them that the most important thing is to know Jesus, and that there is no need to worry if they don’t achieve the academic results they hoped for.

Or let’s talk about the issue that was on the table in Corinth: marriage.

It’s possible that some, like the Corinthians, feel they need to leave their marriage to live as God would want them to.

Perhaps a marriage to someone who opposes your faith or who seems to be dragging you down.

Far be it from me to downplay the difficulty and the pain.

But, as Jason said last Sunday, when you cannot change the situation, when divorce is not an option – that is to say, in almost all situations except a few extreme exceptions – God promises the resources needed to live for him in that situation. (Come and have a chat if you have any questions about this.)

But in my view, many of you are in the opposite situation: believing you need to leave single life behind and get married in order to live as God would want.

We’ll talk more about this next Sunday.

For now, just one thing.

We are free to get married if we want to.

But perhaps it isn’t an option right now.

I’ve been married for 16 years. I still remember what it was like to be single.

The hardest thing about being single wasn’t the lack of sexual intimacy.

For me, it was that feeling — and I want to put this delicately — of being someone who ‘hadn’t been chosen’.

That is a lie.

Everyone who believes in Jesus has been chosen and called by the King of the universe.

It is the only choice that will last for eternity.

Perhaps that is what you need to hear to find contentment today.

A little experiment to finish with.

I wonder how you would finish this sentence.

If only I could change ____, then I’d have the life I was meant to have.

What would you put in the blank?

My job? My education? My single life? My marriage?

God says: ‘you have been bought at a great price; do not become slaves to men.’

‘Brothers and sisters, let each of you remain before God in the condition in which you were called.’

Married, Single, Faithful to God (1 Corinthians 7.1-16)

One of the questions that preoccupies Christians the most is this: “What is God’s will for my life?” I’ve had discussions with so many people over the years about this question, and it always strikes me that when people ask it, they’re almost always asking about situation. Does God want me to work in this job, or marry this person, or live in this city? We act as if God has a map with every step of his plan for us, but he hasn’t shared it with us—instead, he gives us really vague and subjective clues that we have to try to puzzle out and somehow land on the life God wants us to live.

It is such a relief to learn that this is not the case.

Last week, Joe did a fantastic job explaining the problem of sexual immorality in the church in Corinth, and why Paul tells them to flee from it. These people assume that because God has saved their souls, their bodies aren’t really that important, so they can do pretty much whatever they want with them. And Paul says, NO! Your bodies aren’t your own, they belong to God, they are a temple of the Holy Spirit who lives within you. He created your bodies, and what you do with those bodies is very important to him. So flee from sexual immorality. That’s what we saw last week.

It seems that some people in the church also misunderstood this point, but in the opposite direction.

Paul begins chapter 7 by saying, “Now concerning the matters about which you wrote…” Apparently the Corinthians had written Paul a letter expressing some concerns or misunderstandings, and Paul is taking advantage of his teaching at the end of chapter 6, which shows one end of the spectrum, to answer their questions and show the other end of the spectrum.

Intro: Called Where You Are (v. 17, 20, 24)

That’s what we’re going to be looking at for the next couple weeks. But before we get into the practical details (because what Paul writes here is very practical), we need to see why he’s saying it. There is one overarching principle that we see in more depth next week, but that we need to start with today in order to understand what is motivating the instructions he gives.

In v. 17-24, Paul says the same thing three separate times. When a biblical author repeats the same thing multiple times, especially in a short space, you know it’s important.

V. 17:

Only let each person lead the life that the Lord has assigned to him, and to which God has called him.

V. 20:

20 Each one should remain in the condition in which he was called.

V. 24:

24 So, brothers, in whatever condition each was called, there let him remain with God.

So here is the big idea. Paul’s now shifting his focus from people who are clearly immature in their faith, who think that as long as they say they have faith in Christ, they can do anything they want, to people who think they are mature in their faith, but who have a profound misunderstanding of what true Christian maturity actually looks like. They think that Christian maturity comes from massive changes they make to their external situations.

But Paul says that’s not how it works. Real Christian maturity can be seen when we live faithfully within the situation in which he called us.

It’s important to ask, “What ‘calling’ is he talking about?” He’s not talking about a call to ministry, or a call to a particular vocation. He’s talking about the call to follow Christ. That is the call that all of us have received, that all of us share: he has called us to faith in his Son. He has called us to place our trust in him for our salvation, and to live faithfully for him by his grace.

This is crucially important, because the Christian life is about calling…not about external situation. External situations can play a role—some external situations make the Christian life very difficult.

But most do not. And even for those that do, almost none make the Christian life impossible.

It’s absolutely vital that we understand that. Conversion to Christ does not erase our earthly situation. The gospel doesn’t rearrange our marital status, or our social class, or our personality, or our vocation. Rather, it reorients our life inside of those realities.

To put it simply, faithfulness matters more than changes to our external situation. As Paul says in v. 19,

neither circumcision counts for anything nor uncircumcision, but keeping the commandments of God.

That is the underlying principle that guides everything Paul is going to say in our passage today. Paul is going to bring up several different life situations, and he’ll correct misunderstandings that some Corinthians have about what it means to be faithful within those situations.

Married Christians: Faithfulness in Marriage (v. 1–5)

First he talks to married couples, and he rebounds off the subject of sexual immorality to talk about sexual life within marriage. V. 1:

Now concerning the matters about which you wrote: “It is good for a man not to have sexual relations with a woman.” 2 But because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband. 3 The husband should give to his wife her conjugal rights, and likewise the wife to her husband. 4 For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. 5 Do not deprive one another, except perhaps by agreement for a limited time, that you may devote yourselves to prayer; but then come together again, so that Satan may not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.

So what’s going on here? People very often use this text as a sort of instruction manual for a strong marriage. Read the Bible, pray, make love as much as you can—and your marriage will be great. Obviously, these are good things, things we would encourage in marriage… But it’s a mistake to presume that regular sex is a guarantee for a good marriage, and it’s a mistake to use this text to defend it, for several reasons.

First, we need to be sensitive to the reality that some people use the Bible to justify behavior that is profoundly unbiblical. This text has been used many times by predatory spouses to justify what is essentially rape. One spouse says to another, “God says your body doesn’t belong to you, it belongs to me. So you have to do this with me, or you’re living in sin.” I hope we can all be very clear that this is not what Paul’s encouraging.

Second, we need to be sensitive to the reality that the way we speak of this text can inadvertently put pressure on a couple to have a certain kind of sexual life that may be a real challenge for them. For some couples, sex is an easy, natural affair; for other couples, it’s a real struggle—either for reasons of physical health or mental health, or because of past trauma, or for any number of other reasons, it can be very difficult. If you’re married and this is the case for you, you should not read this text and come away feeling guilty that a regular, fulfilled sex life with your spouse is difficult.

The third reason is the simplest. I think it’s a mistake to use this text as an instruction manual for a strong marriage because that’s not what Paul’s trying to do here.

He is responding to a specific misunderstanding within this church. Given the biblical calls to purity, some Corinthians had apparently begun to conclude that since sexual immorality is serious, and sexual temptation is prevalent, it’s better to not engage in any sexual activity, even within the confines of a marriage between one man and one woman. Because sexual sin is serious, we should live totally sexless lives, even within our marriage. These married couples are abstaining from sexual relations with their spouse as a means to be more holy.

And Paul’s saying, “No, that’s not how it works.” Sex in itself is not a sin; in fact, within a marriage it is a means of protection against sexual sin. V. 2: Because of the temptation to sexual immorality, each man should have his own wife and each woman her own husband.

He’s being extremely exclusive—if you’re married, you have one avenue for your God-given sexual desire, and that is your wife. Your husband. No one else.

In other words, marriage between a man and a woman gives a framework to channel sexual desire into covenant unity. Within the marriage that God gives, sex is no longer an end in itself, but a means of building covenant unity. We see this in v. 4, when Paul says,

4 For the wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. Likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does.

This is one of the most counter-cultural statements one could make in the ancient world. And it connects back to what Paul said in last week’s text. You are not your own, he said in v. 19 of chapter 6, you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.

What does that look like in marriage? It looks like remembering that my body isn’t mine, it’s God’s; and that God has, for the time we are married, given my body to my wife.

Paul says we shouldn’t deprive one another—this isn’t to say you can’t say no, but rather that the norm for marriage shouldn’t be no but yes.

That’s God’s intention for marriage. Genesis 2.24:

24 Therefore a man shall leave his father and his mother and hold fast to his wife, and they shall become one flesh. 25 And the man and his wife were both naked and were not ashamed.

That “one flesh” union is referring to union through sexual intercourse; that is the norm for marriage.

You can separate for a time for prayer if you want, but don’t let it go on forever. Take advantage of the gift God has given us in marriage, to build your unity together.

Now we have to be careful here, and recognize that what Paul says here goes both ways. He never once suggests that the man should dominate; and he never once suggests that the woman should be the only one submitting. He’s saying both of us should submit to one another. He speaks of the man giving to his wife her conjugal rights, and vice versa, not of one spouse taking those rights from the other. There is no dynamic of force or pressure here. Marriage is the framework God gives to channel sexual desire into building one another up, not building one spouse up at the expense of the other.

So what does this have to do with the main point we saw earlier? These Corinthians are under the impression that in order to be truly holy, they must do away with all sexual activity within their marriage, and Paul’s saying, “No.” There’s a right way and a wrong way to do it, but be faithful to God where you are. Honor the covenant of marriage; serve your spouse physically and spiritually; do not give into indulgence or domination, but don’t give into asceticism either. Be faithful where you are.

Single Christians: Faithfulness Without Marriage (v. 6-9)

Paul now turns to the single Christians in the church. V. 6:

6 Now as a concession, not a command, I say this. 7 I wish that all were as I myself am. But each has his own gift from God, one of one kind and one of another.
8 To the unmarried and the widows I say that it is good for them to remain single, as I am. 9 But if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

There are a lot of false ideas about what Paul says here, so I’ll just take them one by one.

First (v. 6), he wants to be clear before he starts that he’s not commanding that single Christians stay single, or that single Christians get married. You can stay single, or you can get married. Both are fine.

Second, I know that v. 9 can be misleading if we read it too quickly, so I just want to be clear: if your main reason for wanting to get married is that you struggle with sexual temptation, don’t get married. At least not yet. Wanting to have sexual relations with someone is a terrible reason to marry them. And I don’t think that’s what Paul is suggesting at all when he says, if they cannot exercise self-control, they should marry. For it is better to marry than to burn with passion.

I think that Paul is using just a hint of irony to highlight something extremely important. If you take sexual sin on one hand, and marriage till death do us part on the other hand, which would you say is the riskier option? Which of the two do people take more seriously? People think sexual sin is something that is unfortunate, but “normal”, and relatively risk free. But they’ll think long and hard, they’ll take everything into consideration, often for months or years, before getting married—because getting married is for life.

But this thinking is backwards. According to Paul, if you have to choose between sexual immorality and marriage, marriage is the least risky of the two. He’s not bringing marriage down to the level of a means of satisfying sexual desire; he’s elevating the seriousness of sexual sin.

Sexual sin is so serious that it would be less risky to marry someone for life rather than fall into it.

Third (v. 7-8)—and I really pray that those of you who are single in this room will hear this—Paul says as clearly as possible that singleness is a good thing. Singleness is a gift. We put marriage on such a high pedestal, and marriage is a gift from God. But if anything, Paul actually puts a higher premium on singleness than on marriage. He says, “I wish that all were as I myself am.” He recognizes that it will be tough for some, but he’s very clear that it’s a good thing to be single and to stay single.

He’ll explain why later on in the chapter, but for now we really need to see that this burning desire many single Christians have with marriage can easily fall into the category of idolatry if we’re not careful. Marriage is a gift, yes; but singleness is also a gift. Both are tools that God uses to shape us into his image, at particular times in our lives, and he won’t use the same tools on everyone in the same way and at the same time.

People have often asked me if I thought they might have “the gift of singleness.” They always ask me this question with a frightened look on their face, hoping I don’t say yes, because they want to get married. My answer is always the same.

They ask, “How do I know if I have the gift of singleness?”

I say, “Well…are you single?” If you are, then you have your answer.

Peter tells us in 2 Peter 1 that God has given us all things that pertain to life and godliness. Paul affirms the same thing in chapter 1 of this letter. God will not hold back to any of his children what they need to live faithfully for him. If you are single, then at least for now, you’ve got the gift! You’ve got what you need to remain faithful in your singleness.

That’s the point of everything Paul’s saying here. Being single in no way impedes your ability to live faithfully for Christ. Some situations make the Christian life easier, but no Christian life is truly “easy.” (And, for the record, marriage does not make the Christian life easier. It brings its own set of obstacles and complications, which we’ll see in coming weeks.)

Again, it comes down to the question of maturity. Christian maturity isn’t measured by marital status or the exercise (or lack thereof) of sexual desire. It is measured by faithfulness to God within your calling.

Married Believers: Faithfulness in Difficulty (v. 10-11)

Now Paul comes back to married Christians, and gives them a very simple and blatant command that comes back to the main point. V. 10:

10 To the married I give this charge (not I, but the Lord): the wife should not separate from her husband 11 (but if she does, she should remain unmarried or else be reconciled to her husband), and the husband should not divorce his wife.

Obviously, Paul doesn’t say everything there is to say about this subject here; in Matthew 5, Jesus gives at least one legitimate reason for divorce, which is sexual immorality. Paul’s point isn’t to be exhaustive on the topic of divorce. He simply wants to remind the Corinthians of God’s intention for marriage—that is, marriage is meant to be permanent, as long as the husband and the wife are both living.

There are obviously some reasons in which separation may be necessary—but the ultimate goal is the restoration of that marriage, the reconciliation of the husband and wife.

And yes—let’s call a spade a spade: the Bible’s stand on this subject is strict. It does give a way out for people who have suffered in very specific situations, but those situations don’t apply to most. So saying that if separation occurs, the solution should not be divorce, but rather celibacy or reconciliation…that’s a hard pill to swallow. Paul, and Jesus, refuse to normalize divorce.

But the reason for this strictness is very simple; we’ve been talking about it in our couples’ class. Marriage is meant to be a living picture of the relationship between Christ and the church—and the relationship between Christ and his church is eternal. It is unbreakable. It is a covenant that God has made with his people, and God will not break his covenant.

Consequently, according to God’s plan, marriage is not disposable. If we go into marriage thinking that the goal is our own happiness, a simple celebration of love, then that union will be disposable; we’ll jettison it the moment it no longer fulfills our needs. But if we go into marriage realizing that its goal is to show the gospel to the world…that changes everything. If that’s our goal, then our own happiness is no longer the primary consideration; whether or not this marriage “is working” isn’t the main consideration. The main consideration is, how do we remain faithful to Christ IN the situation in which we find ourselves?

Is it difficult? Of course—sometimes unimaginably so. Is it impossible? Never. If God gives us what we need to stay faithful to him, he also gives us what we need to stay faithful to each other.

So there we have it again: wherever you are, that’s where God calls you to be faithful—even if where you are is in the middle of a difficult marriage. Serve him where you are.

Mixed Marriages: Faithfulness in a Less-Than-Ideal Situation (v. 12-16)

At this point, a new scenario appears, and it complicates things a bit. The Bible says on multiple occasions that if you are a follower of Christ and you’re getting married, you should seek to marry another follower of Christ. It tells us not to marry an unbeliever, for a variety of very simple reasons.

But what happens if you’re already married, both of you are unbelievers, and one of you meets Christ? What happens then? Some Corinthians apparently thought that in that case, the believing spouse should divorce the unbelieving spouse. But Paul gives the following advice (v. 12):

12 To the rest I say (I, not the Lord) that if any brother has a wife who is an unbeliever, and she consents to live with him, he should not divorce her. 13 If any woman has a husband who is an unbeliever, and he consents to live with her, she should not divorce him. 14 For the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife, and the unbelieving wife is made holy because of her husband. Otherwise your children would be unclean, but as it is, they are holy. 15 But if the unbelieving partner separates, let it be so. In such cases the brother or sister is not enslaved. God has called you to peace. 16 For how do you know, wife, whether you will save your husband? Or how do you know, husband, whether you will save your wife?

One thing to clarify before we get to the main point. When Paul says in v. 14 that “the unbelieving husband is made holy because of his wife” and vice versa, that as it is, “your children…are holy,” he’s not saying that the faith of the believing spouse actually saves the unbelieving spouse or the children. He’s talking about influence.

We don’t baptize babies at this church; we believe baptism should happen following a profession of faith made by the individual who’s being baptized. But we do insist on the wonderful benefit of being a child that grows up in a family of faith. A parents’ faith doesn’t make a child automatically Christian; but it does give that child a front-row seat to the faith. It gives them the opportunity to be exposed to the gospel over and over again; and God regularly uses the influence of a faithful Christian parent to bring a child to faith, as many of you know firsthand.

Well, the same thing can be true for an unbelieving spouse. It isn’t always—the unbelieving spouse can also have influence on the believer in the couple—but it is possible. God can save anyone he wants, and he can use someone who is close, like a spouse, to do it.

And so, Paul says, if your unbelieving spouse wants to stay with you, then stay with them—be faithful where you are, and do not initiate divorce. Your conversion to the faith after your marriage does not make it less of a marriage, and you never know what God may choose to do through your influence.

That being said, Paul does give a way out. If the unbelieving spouse wants to leave, then let them leave. As he says, “God has called you to peace.” That is not to say that marriages between two Christians aren’t difficult or can’t be conflictual, we just talked about that; the point is that a Christian isn’t doomed to endless marital conflict because of their faith.

If they want to stay, then stay; if they want to leave, let them leave. Serve God faithfully, and trust God with the outcome. In either case, the Christian spouse is called to faithfulness where he or she is.

Conclusion

So I think the unifying principle of this text has been repeated enough to be clear: live faithfully for God where you are.

If you’re married, obey God and serve your spouse.

If you’re single, obey God and practice self-control.

if you’re married to an unbeliever, obey God in your home and stay there if you can.

If you’re abandoned by an unbeliever, obey God and live in peace.

Every person in this room is concerned by what we see in this text in one way or another. But it goes even deeper than that. The Corinthians have assumed that spiritual growth requires a change in their circumstances. But the gospel does not demand that all Christians move into the same structure of life; it demands that everyone submit their current life to Christ.

This may speak to many of us even more than the question of marriage or singleness or purity. How many people here have felt frustrated by the circumstances in their lives, and imagined that if only _______ was different, my Christian life would be so much more fulfilling? How many people here have had that thought that if only I lived in this place, or had this job, or was married to this person, or wasn’t married to this person, or had this security, then finally I’d be able to live for God the way I want to?

I know for a fact that this is a thought that comes up very often, because I’ve thought it myself more than once, and I’ve had discussions with so many people over the years that come down to this simple fact.

If I can be frank with you all, with all the love I have for you: God is sovereign over your life. The life that you have—the situation in which you find yourself today—is the life he has given you. It may not be the life you wanted, but it’s the life he’s given you. And when he saved you, it wasn’t to give you different circumstances, but to give you a different heart, a different identity, and a different eternity.

Christian maturity is not about escaping the life you were living. It is about transforming that life through obedience.

The question is not: “Do I need a different life?”

The question is: “How do I live faithfully to Christ in the life he has given me?”

The Real Sexual Revolution (1 Corinthians 6:9-20)

Hello everyone,

If you're joining us, we're currently reading through the first letter to the Corinthians in the Bible.
Here is our question for this morning: how does Jesus change the way we experience sexuality?

Or to put it more positively: how does Jesus enable us to experience a beautiful sexuality?

Some of you may be thinking, "I don't see how Jesus enables us to experience beautiful sexuality at all!"

[SLIDE] We live in a world that has been profoundly shaped by the sexual revolution of the 1960s.

In May 1968, people demanded the right to freely choose their partner(s), to change them, and to do whatever they wanted as long as there was consent between adults.

This revolution left its mark on all of us.

If today the majority considers sexual relations outside of marriage to be normal, this is the result.

Tinder, Grindr, Gleeden and all similar apps are consequences of this.

And for many, the very idea that someone could tell us how to live our sexuality is scandalous.

How does Jesus change the way I live my sexuality? Many would respond: I don't want to know. [SLIDE]

A healthy sexuality would only be possible if we affirmed, as protesters did 60 years ago:
"My body is mine."

For Christians today, taking a stand is not easy.

Perhaps we have experienced this:

"Why don't you ever have fun with someone you meet at a party? Why are you so uptight?"

Or: "How come you've been dating for months and still haven't slept together?"

Or: "Watching porn to unwind is just satisfying a natural need. What's the problem?"

If you're like me, this kind of talk can seem appealing. It can be tempting to go with the flow and adopt the same slogan:
"My body is mine. What I do with it is my business."

How does Jesus change the way we experience sexuality?

Two thousand years ago, the Christians of Corinth in Greece were just as lost.

Corinth had a reputation for debauchery. There was even a verb: "to Corinthianise" - to lead a promiscuous sexual life.

And the Christians of Corinth saw no reason why they should live differently from others.

Their reasoning was simple: for God, only the spiritual matters, not the material.

But the body is material. Therefore, it is of no importance to God. We can do whatever we want with it.

So there was no problem with sleeping with a prostitute from the pagan temple or having an incestuous relationship. God doesn't care what we do with our bodies.

***

This is precisely where they were wrong.

How does Jesus change the way we live our sexuality?

Everything!

(slowly) Because for God, our bodies — and what we do with them — matter deeply.

That is the message this morning:

Our bodies matter to God.

They are precious to him. What we do with them is of great importance.

The real revolution is that of Jesus. Jesus frees us for a sexuality that is much more beautiful and healthy than what our society offers us.

...

A brief aside.

We all approach the issue of sexuality—myself included—as people who have failed.

No one can 'preach', certainly not me.

So no moralising this morning!

Our goal is to see how God's grace frees us to live a beautiful sexuality.

Two points:

1. Our bodies matter to God

2. Let us consecrate our bodies to God

1. Our bodies matter to God

Read with me 1 Corinthians 6:19

“Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, which you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price.”

Fifty years after the sexual revolution, there is no evidence that we are any freer with our bodies.

In the age of Instagram, many feel completely enslaved by their bodies.

Why?

Because although it sounds good to say that my body belongs to me, it puts me under pressure! My body has to be attractive!

And if it is less appealing than Kim Kardashian's — or even that of my friend who has a string of partners — then I have failed.

I can say it belongs to me, but in reality, it is a slave to others whose gaze can be merciless.

The apostle Paul starts elsewhere.

If I believe in Jesus, my body belongs to Jesus.

He is the master. And he is infinitely more benevolent than Instagram!

Paul gives us three reasons why our bodies matter to God:

We have been redeemed by Jesus
We will be resurrected with Jesus
We are connected to Jesus.

We have been redeemed by Jesus (vv. 9-11)

Verse 9

“Do you not know that the unrighteous will not inherit the kingdom of God? Do not be deceived: neither the sexually immoral, nor idolaters, nor adulterers, nor men who practise homosexuality, nor thieves, nor the greedy, nor drunkards, nor revilers, nor swindlers will inherit the kingdom of God. And that is what some of you were. But you have been washed, but you have been declared holy, but you have been declared righteous in the name of the Lord Jesus Christ and by the Spirit of our God.

A few years ago, Paris Saint-Germain bought Neymar Junior from FC Barcelona.

222 million euros, the most expensive transfer in football history, but with a significant cost to the player's loyalties as well.

He had to be reminded: Neymar, you play for PSG now! You no longer belong to Barcelona. Remember which side you're on! You've changed teams.

This is somewhat similar to what happened to Christians.

We have been redeemed, transferred to God's side to play on his team and live according to his ways.

Paul describes the life of the Corinthians before they became Christians.

Debauched, idolaters, adulterers, transvestites, homosexuals (a better translation would be those who practise homosexuality), thieves, always wanting to possess more, drunkards, slanderers, exploiters...

Paul is clear. Those who live these lifestyles will not inherit the kingdom of God.

But he continues: this is what some of you used to be! You were no different from others.

Just as we, too, may have all kinds of dark things in our past...

But verse 11:

...you have been washed, but you have been declared holy, but you have been declared righteous."

***

He has "washed" us

We may have done or suffered things that we are ashamed of.

Even if the memories remain in our minds, they no longer cling to us before God. He has cleansed us, through the death of Jesus, from all our defilements, if we have believed in him.

He has "declared us holy" - he has set us apart for himself.

Some people have knives that are only for cheese. Nothing else! They are set apart for the glorious purpose of eating cheese.

That is what it means to be "declared holy". God has set us apart to serve him.

And he has "declared us righteous".

If we visited the church in Corinth and asked them to tell us their stories, we would probably want to vomit. But when God looked at them, he didn't see sexual sinners. He saw... Jesus!

No matter what your past is. No matter what wrongs you have committed or suffered. God declares us perfect — as righteous as his Son!

So, since God paid the price for our transfer,

since we have a clean jersey with Jesus written on the back,

since we have been set apart to serve on God's team...

...we no longer follow the prevailing culture. We play the other way. We have changed sides.

Our bodies matter because we have been redeemed by Jesus.

It also matters because...

• We will be resurrected with Jesus (vv. 12-14)

Verse 12

“Everything is permissible for me, but not everything is beneficial; everything is permissible for me, but I will not be dominated by anything. Food is for the stomach and the stomach is for food, and God will destroy both of them. But the body is not for sexual immorality: it is for the Lord, and the Lord is for the body. Now God, who raised the Lord, will also raise us up by his power."

The expressions "everything is permissible for me" and "food is for the stomach and the stomach is for food" are undoubtedly the slogans of the Corinthians.

Perhaps they were saying this: sex is a simple biological process. Like digesting a meal. It is a spiritually neutral function of the body.

What matters is the spirit. The spirit is eternal. The body is only temporary.

We are like a snake that sheds its skin and leaves it behind.

This is not so far removed from what we hear today.

I remember a song released in the late 1990s by the band Bloodhound Gang:

You and me, baby, ain't nothing but mammals

So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel

You and me, baby, we're nothing but mammals

So let's do it like they do on the Discovery Channel

Sex is a biological function with no consequences!

I have read quotes from Catholic priests who defended their one-night stands by saying, "It's just a way for my body to unwind." "I am still chaste in my soul."

As if their bodies were unimportant.

But to God, our bodies matter... because they have a future!

Verse 13

"The body is not meant for sexual immorality: it is for the Lord, and the Lord is for the body. Now God, who raised the Lord, will also raise us up by his power."

We are not just spirits trapped in bodies that we will leave behind.

God raised Jesus' body; He will raise ours too.

So we cannot use this body as if it were destined to be thrown away. A glorious future awaits it!

Imagine it's the day before your wedding.

Tonight, someone invites you to play football on a muddy pitch... wearing your outfit already prepared for the ceremony.

You refuse.

Not because the outfit is fragile, but because you know what it is meant for.

You already treat it according to the glorious event for which it is made.

That is Paul's idea: our bodies are destined for resurrection. They will be resurrected to glorify God perfectly. So we already treat them in a manner consistent with that future, not as something mundane.

Our bodies are for the Lord and therefore not for "sexual immorality."

The expression "sexual immorality" translates the word porneia. It refers to any form of sexual stimulation outside the framework intended by God for marriage between a man and a woman.

Our bodies are too precious, and their future too glorious, to be treated carelessly.

Our bodies matter... because we will be resurrected.

And our bodies matter because...

• We are connected to Jesus (vv. 15-17)

The Bible teaches that the ultimate purpose of marriage and sex is to serve as a portrait of the relationship between Jesus and his people.

That is why marriage is a public, permanent, and physical commitment between a man and a woman.

Because it illustrates Jesus' public, permanent and physical commitment to us.

On the cross, Jesus committed himself to us publicly, in front of the whole world.

He committed himself permanently, with a view to a relationship that will never end. We will be loved by him forever!

He committed himself to us physically, by shedding his blood.

Sex and marriage point to this.

So if I claim to have a relationship with Jesus, but my sexual life denies this kind of commitment, there is a contradiction.

Look at verse 15.

“Do you not know that your bodies are members of Christ? Shall I then take the members of Christ and make them members of a prostitute? Certainly not! Do you not know that he who is joined to a prostitute becomes one body with her? For it is said, ‘The two shall become one flesh. ’ But he who is joined to the Lord becomes one spirit with him.”

Since sex exists to illustrate Jesus' commitment to us, it always creates a bond.

Paul quotes the book of Genesis, where God created sex so that husband and wife would become one.

Whether you are a believer or not, I think we all know this!

A 'one-night stand' is never just a one-night stand. It creates a bond between two people.

But if we are Christians, our bodies are bound to Christ.

Paul says that our bodies are members of Christ. He says that

"He who is joined to the Lord is one spirit with Him."

We are attached to Jesus.

The problem is not physically uniting with someone while being united with Christ.

It is not that sex and Jesus are incompatible.

Next Sunday we will see that the Bible encourages husbands and wives to make love!

Rather, if my body is bound to Jesus, I cannot use it for sexual relations that completely contradict this idea of a public, permanent, and physical commitment.

Sex is much more important and meaningful than we usually think.

When God was looking for an illustration of the relationship he wanted with us, when he was preparing a trailer for eternal joy, intimacy and love... he invented sex!

It's not that sex is desirable for us but disgusting for God.

No, God has a much more glorious vision of sex than we do!

That is why human beings desire sex. We do not just crave a sensation, but a relationship.

The writer G. K. Chesterton said that every man who knocks on the door of a brothel... is looking for God!

Because God invented sex as an image of the relationship he wants with us!

It is scandalous, almost blasphemous, that Christians have sometimes presented sex as dirty when it is eminently spiritual.

But if it is true that my body is united with Jesus, who has committed himself to us, I cannot use that body for relationships that totally contradict the idea of a public, permanent and physical commitment.

Paul speaks of prostitution, but this applies to any sexual stimulation outside of marriage — in bed or through a screen.

We cannot celebrate a permanent union with Christ and multiply temporary unions elsewhere.

Our bodies matter because we are connected to Jesus.

_______

You may be familiar with the series Sex and the City.

It features New York women who have a string of casual relationships.

I came across an article written by a journalist who is a fan of the series and admits to having tried to live like the main character.

"As soon as I had the opportunity to adopt the same lifestyle as Samantha (the protagonist), I did so and suffered. I had as many men as possible, drank as many cranberry martinis as possible, and tried to convince myself that I too could live in a blaze of alcoholic, feminine, and possibly feminist glory.

"The problem was that I wasn't up to it. I had feelings. I was incapable of feeling indifferent when cutting ties after sex, whether I liked the man in question or not. I couldn't manage to use men light-heartedly. It always depressed me, just as it did when I was the one being used."

To my knowledge, she is not a Christian.

But she saw something true.

Our bodies matter.

It is not meant to be used lightly.

It is made for a public, permanent, physical union.

They are made for Jesus.

If we grasp that, it is revolutionary... and there is only one answer...

Our bodies matter to God...

1. Let us consecrate our bodies to God (vv. 18-20)

This passage contains two imperatives.

The first is in verse 18

"Flee from sexual immorality. Every other sin a person commits is outside the body, but the sexually immoral person sins against his own body."

Perhaps you are thinking: OK, our bodies matter to God, we must use them to honour Him, sex is for marriage... but where is the line between what we can and cannot do?

How far can we go physically if we are dating someone, for example?

Where is the line between what is permissible and what is not?

But it is striking that Paul does not ask himself: where is the line?

He says, "Flee... sexual immorality."

I don't know if you've ever had to run for your life.

My family has a dog, so we see how dogs interact with humans, and sometimes we see what it looks like to run for your life!

The classic case: a small child in a park. Suddenly, a big dog (not ours) runs towards him barking.

What does the child do?

Seeing this beast charging towards him with its fangs dripping with saliva, he doesn't think, "I wonder how close I can let it get... without it biting me?

He runs... as far away as possible...

... and he runs to his father or mother for protection.

That's what Paul says about any sexual stimulation outside of marriage.

Flee from it!

The question of limits is the wrong question.

"Flee!"

With a boyfriend or girlfriend, the question is not: how far can we go physically?

It's how to flee from danger!

For example, if I am a young man dating a young woman who lives in another city.

When she visits me, where does she sleep?

She could sleep at my place. It's not a sin to sleep under the same roof.

But is being alone in an apartment with someone I'm attracted to and not yet married to the best way to avoid danger?

Personally, I would avoid it.

Or for those of us who are married, it's likely that at some point we'll meet someone with whom, under different circumstances, it could have worked out.

We could have gotten together.

We must be extremely vigilant!

It is tempting to think that a little flirting won't hurt anyone.

But God asks us to flee from sexual temptation, not to play with fire.

We are particularly at risk when we are tired, when our spirits are low, or when our relationship is going through a difficult time.

Or if we struggle with pornography, and let's not be too prudish, it's a struggle for a lot of people, men and women...

...let's be radical!

Let's flee from danger and flee to Jesus.

Flee from danger – download a filter for your computer or phone today.

Put your devices in the basement overnight if you have to.

Anticipate risky moments and plan other activities.

Let us flee from danger, even if it means taking radical measures.

But to win this battle, it's not enough to simply say no to the desires of the flesh. If we stop there, we will eventually crack. We must flee to Jesus.

This is the only approach that works in the long term, and here's why.

Where does the desire to consume pornography come from?

Some hypotheses

From the feeling of lacking something.

From loneliness

From the feeling of not being desired

From shame about our bodies

A feeling of futility in life.

I could go on.

(slowly) All these things, the good news of Jesus answers them!

That's where the war will be won. Not just by saying no to our desires, but by saying yes to Jesus.

If loneliness is the problem... we are connected to Jesus! We have the most important relationship. He loved us at the cost of his blood. We are never alone! We are cherished by him today and for eternity!

Or if we feel like we are missing out because we are depriving ourselves of certain pleasures, let us flee to Jesus and take the Bible at its word:

"The Lord is my shepherd, I shall not want." Psalm 23

"Those who seek the Lord lack no good thing" - Psalm 34

"There is abundance of joy in your presence, eternal happiness at your right hand" - Psalm 16

Pornography promises to fill a void. Only Jesus can fill that void.

But we must flee to him to experience it.

Or if we feel trapped in shame, it alters our perception of ourselves. We may end up saying to ourselves, "This is who I am, a sexual sinner—there's nothing I can do about it."

But when God looks at us, He doesn't see sexual sinners. He sees... Jesus!

He sees people who have been washed, sanctified and declared righteous.

We must flee to Jesus so that He can remind us of this.

Let us flee from sexual immorality and finally,

• let us glorify God in our bodies.

Verse 20

“Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, which you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.”

The Corinthians were wrong. Our sexual behaviour is indeed part of our spiritual life.

Seeking a sexuality that pleases God is a form of worship.

The sexuality He created for this body is truly the best!

I am addressing the married people among us. Let us strive to live a beautiful sexuality!

This may surprise some people; it is easy to neglect this area. We must be proactive!

(slowly) If you are going through things in your relationship that prevent you from enjoying a beautiful sexuality, please seek help. The couples' course is there for that. The leaders are there to listen to you.

***

If you are single and finding it difficult, we will have a sermon on singleness in a few weeks, but the Church is there for us to share our struggles, frustrations and temptations!

If you are a student, you are probably bombarded with the message that what we do with our bodies is inconsequential as long as there is consent.

But God made us for a sexuality that is much more beautiful than what you see on Instagram or at most student or high school parties.

No matter what our friends or hormones suggest.

And parents... teach this to your children.

Your body is the temple of the Holy Spirit. You do not belong to yourself, for you have been bought at a great price!

Many of our children are young, but it is better to tell them too soon than too late.

***

Finally, if you have discovered that you are attracted to people of the same sex, and in a group of this size, that will apply to several of us, do not keep it to yourself!

It is a heavy burden to bear alone... in a world that encourages us to act on these desires!

I would have liked to have a whole sermon on homosexuality.

I will simply say that temptation is not sin...

...and that if you have chosen to obey Jesus rather than your desires, going against the grain of our society, you are a modern-day hero of faith.

And you have much to teach us about what it means to be a disciple who takes up his cross to follow Jesus.

Open yourself up to other Christians. Ask them to wrestle with you in prayer.

***

In conclusion, one of the paradoxes of our time is that our culture is both ultra-sexualised and actually devalues sex.

A few years ago, there were advertisements in the underground for the dating site "Adopte".

Love letters written by users of the site, some of them rather beautiful and romantic.

Then underneath, in total contrast, was the site's logo - a woman placing a man in a supermarket trolley.

Sex everywhere. The meaning of sex lost.

The good news of Jesus offers us so much, so much better.

Perhaps you wouldn't identify yourself as a Christian this morning. We are delighted to have you with us.

If you want to discover sexuality in all its beauty, if you want the authentic version, not the cheap version, if you want to know its true meaning...

...come to Jesus!

His is the real sexual revolution.

And I pray for all of us that we may be true revolutionaries.

_______________

How can someone struggling with same-sex desires be assured of their salvation and avoid thinking that this disqualifies them?

Same-sex attraction ≠ sin

Homosexual relations are not a separate category of sin

If you experience this temptation, you are no worse than anyone else

We are all broken by sin, and this is just one way that some of us are broken

But if you believe in Jesus, God sees you as perfect

Hebrews 4:16

Just a dispute? (1 Corinthians 6:1–11)

Introduction

Most of you don't know this, but the television programmes that air in the afternoon on weekdays in Latin America are a catastrophe. They are truly absurd shows.

There was one programme in particular that was, admittedly, interesting to watch, but I always found it very unhealthy: Casos de Familia ("Family Cases"). A show where the host listens to two members of the same family arguing over a particular issue, and the host asks questions and acts somewhat like a mediator — though not too much, because if reconciliation comes too quickly, the show loses its appeal. And I always thought to myself, "Why are these people exposing themselves to this level of ridicule? Are they being paid to do it?" Because, most of the time, the disputes were rather petty, and it was clear that one of the parties — or both — were acting in bad faith.

You might think that what the apostle Paul wants to avoid here is the Corinthians, as a church, exposing themselves to the same kind of ridicule.

The context is, indeed, somewhat similar: people within their community had disputes — civil disputes, not criminal ones — and were taking each other to court before potentially corrupt tribunals.

Is it simply that Paul doesn't want them to have bad press by airing their conflicts out in the open like that? One could read this text as a recommendation to "keep your dirty laundry in the family." But it would be a mistake to reduce this passage to that.

No, the rebuke Paul makes here is a continuation of the corrections he brings to the church of Corinth — yet another example of the problems this church had. The reality of what it means to be a community of Jesus' disciples had not yet penetrated the minds and behaviour of this community. Hence Paul's emphasis on the gap between the faith they profess and their failing communal life.

"Do you not know that the saints will judge the world?"

Here, Paul makes an important and striking theological statement: those who belong to Christ, the Messiah, will join him at the Last Judgement to judge the world — all of creation, angels included.

This may seem strange, and you might even think it's something you don't particularly want to do. But this was declared by Jesus himself:

"Truly I tell you, at the renewal of all things, when the Son of Man sits on his glorious throne, you who have followed me will also sit on twelve thrones, judging the twelve tribes of Israel." — Matthew 19:28

And similar texts appear elsewhere in the Bible, such as Daniel 7 or Revelation 2. But isn't it Jesus who will judge? In what way will those who belong to Christ actually judge the world? Much ink has been spilled on this subject, with differing opinions.

I won't go into the details of the various interpretations, but the most important thing is that they all point to the following reality: those who belong to Christ will share in his discernment between what is good and evil, what is just and unjust.

It may seem like a lot — judging angels — but in another epistle, the letter to the Galatians, Paul tells Christians to judge, to discern, whether someone comes proclaiming a gospel different from the one they received. Even if it were an angel!

So yes, as people who belong to the Messiah, our destiny is to have discernment perfectly aligned with his, guided by the Holy Spirit. And therefore to understand and participate in his judgement — the ultimate determination of what is just or unjust, good or evil.

If that is our future destiny, at the end of all things, how should we act now? Should we not, in word and in practice, hold justice in the highest regard in both great and small matters?

But one might ask, what's wrong with going before a civil court to defend your case? The question I ask — and that Paul asks — is "why?" It's the same question I used to ask myself when I watched people going on that TV show to complain about their brother, cousin, or aunt. Why? Are they really in a family so devoid of people who can offer good counsel? Are they in a family so divided that no one can be considered trustworthy?

That is the same question Paul asks: Is there not a single wise person among you who can judge between brothers and sisters? Is there no one who shows even a little of the discernment of justice that comes with Christian maturity, with the work of the Holy Spirit in us? Are we really sure this is the community called to judge the world and the angels?

If we think there is no one in our community who can advise us, it is either because that community is no longer truly putting its faith into practice, or because — more likely — we despise the wisdom of our brothers and sisters and, out of pride, refuse to submit to their counsel.

Here, it is important that I pause to make an important distinction: we are talking about disputes, civil disagreements. We are not talking about criminal offences. Violence, abuse, crimes — these matters fall within the criminal domain and are outside the scope of a dispute between two individuals. A criminal offence is an attack on public order, and therefore concerns all citizens — the criminal justice system of the state must be engaged in such cases. The same cannot be said for civil proceedings — where even the state encourages, when possible, the reconciliation of the parties through alternative means. We are talking about things like disagreements following the sale of property, financial consequences of a late payment, liability following an accident.

So yes, I dare say that if you are in a church faithful to the gospel, you will find — and even easily — someone who is ready to listen to you and act as a mediator in a dispute. "Do you not know that we will judge angels? How much more the matters of everyday life!"

But even better is not having disputes against a brother at all. That is what the apostle suggests to us in his question: "Why not rather suffer wrong?"

"Why not rather suffer wrong?"

The question may seem surprising. And not at all a solution. But yes, in a dispute, one can say that one party is wrong and the other is right — though sometimes both are wrong. Here, Paul is speaking to the person who would, in principle, be in the right. Why not endure the injustice, for the sake of your brothers and sisters?

You see, what Paul asks here is no different from what he himself does. He describes his own behaviour, and that of the other apostles, in chapter 4: "When we are cursed, we bless; when we are persecuted, we endure it; when we are slandered, we answer kindly." And he asks the Corinthians to imitate this behaviour. To be patient in the face of injustice. To forgive those who have wronged you.

Nor is this any different from what Jesus taught his disciples: "If anyone wants to sue you and take your shirt, hand over your coat as well." (Matthew 5:40)

This is what Jesus taught, and what Paul teaches here. It is a radical call to those who are "in the right" in a dispute: endure with patience and goodwill. Respond to an offence with a blessing.

In verses 9 and 10, one might get the impression that Paul changes the subject by listing sinners who will not inherit the kingdom of heaven. It is, moreover, a list that is not at all a random sample of sins, but rather sins particularly prevalent in the city of Corinth at the time.

But Paul has just told us to accept injustice and, in the very next sentence, warns us that the unjust will not inherit the Kingdom! Why this transition?

The first reason: it is yet another reminder, like the one from last week, that living in a state of unrepentant sin is not an option for a Christian. The one who lives in injustice, who defrauds their brother, and who systematically refuses to repent of their sin — that person renders their profession of faith void and should not have any assurance of an inheritance in the kingdom.

The second reason: Paul reminds them that "that is what some of you were." It was in a state of sin and injustice that the Corinthians found themselves before their conversion. They may not have practised all of these sins. But sinners nonetheless, and therefore unjust before a just and holy God who would have been fully within his rights to condemn them. But God, instead of passing sentence upon them, responded to injustice with his grace.

"But you were washed, but you were sanctified, but you were justified in the name of the Lord Jesus and by the Spirit of our God."

Now, being aware of having received such great forgiveness, can it really seem coherent to go and sue a brother over trivial matters? As a disciple of Christ, at my own level, I must seek to imitate him and forgive in turn.

Conclusion

You see, this passage begins and ends with two profound theological statements: at the beginning of the passage, the reminder of the end of times, when the saints will participate in judgement alongside Christ, who has received the authority to judge all things. At the end of the passage, the reminder of salvation — the sacrifice of Christ that declared us righteous when we were unrighteous. Two theological truths about Christ, about us, about our relationship to his justice, present and future.

Two truths that may seem very transcendent to us but which invite us to concrete and practical behaviours right now.

Particularly concerning possible disputes with a brother or sister. So, if you have a disagreement, if you think a brother or sister has wronged you in any way, this text invites you to:

• Consider how you can put forgiveness into practice in that situation;

• Call upon the wisdom of a brother or sister for mediation;

• Not adopt a vindictive posture, even when you are clearly in the right.

When we do this, we imitate — at our own scale — the Christ who saved us and declared us righteous when we were still unrighteous. When a local church puts this into practice, it looks like a community of disciples whose behaviour points towards its Saviour, and not like a dysfunctional family that ends up on a reality TV show.